Down to Earth. 'Look out ole Jesus is Back!' August 6, 2018

 

So I bumped into Jesus at the WaWa this morning…

ME: You’re back! I’m so glad you didn’t resign.

JESUS: I just needed a couple of weeks off to chillax.

ME: Did you do anything?

JESUS: Hung with Dad mostly. We did some deep sea fishing and Dad tried para-gliding. We also did our annual review of the 10 Commandments.

ME: Oh? I didn’t know you did that. How’d it go?

JESUS: Well, I don’t recommend you try it after 4 mojitos. We got a little crazy. We got up to 32 Commandments and called it a night after Dad came up with, “Thou shalt not give out participation trophies.” But we did come up with one we think might stick.

ME: What’s that?

JESUS: Thou shalt not wear white after Labor Day.

ME: Everyone pretty much follows that rule anyway.

JESUS: That’s what I told Dad. But he gets really stubborn after the third mojito. We decided against it eventually. I just couldn’t see sending Moses all the way up the mountain again for 40 days just for that.

ME: Well it’s good to see you again. Listen I’m going inside. Do you want anything?

JESUS: Some beef jerky and a bottle of Poland Spring water would be nice…oh and cigarettes too?

ME: You got it, my friend.

JESUS: Just out of curiosity, how do you feel about, “Thou shalt not believe diddly when it comes to Fox News”?

ME: It’s good. But save that for the lost tribe.

JESUS: Throwing too much shade?

ME: Yup.